· Isaiah says, "Woe is me! I am lost, for I am a man of unclean lips, and I live among a people of unclean lips."
· Paul says, “For I am the least of the apostles, not fit to be called an apostle because I persecuted the church of God.”
· Peter says, “Depart from me, Lord, for I am a sinful man.”
These sound alike, voices of unworthiness. Each of them thinks of himself as incapable of any good. Yet, there is a message of transformation that happens with each of these men. Let’s reflect on how to conquer the voices of negativity and self-image and how transformation happens through Christ. Like Peter, let's reflect on the invitation to trust Jesus. If we cast our fears, doubts, and anxieties into the deep, Jesus takes over.
We hear about the fishermen of the gospel as they go to the sea with high expectations. Yet, they are not able to step out of their (boats of) anxieties and doubts. They are not able to overcome their fears. Jesus is aware of that. He steps into Simon’s boat for that purpose and asks him to put out a little from the shore. This is not a coincidence. Christ shows up to take care of the invisible fears, doubts, and anxieties that threaten our healthy functioning and openness to grace. As humans, those doubts and anxieties exist irrespective of our expertise and qualifications. They threaten our internal spiritual stability. They speak to us internally as being real and make us think less of ourselves.
As Jesus invites Simon to “put out a little from the shore,” he goes off to do something else. It is as if he is not interested in Simon’s problems. When Jesus circles back to Simon, it is with emphasis, “Put out into the deep water and lower your nets for a catch.” This clarity helps Simon and his crew for several reasons. Sometimes God allows us to deal with those feelings to test our faith. God desires that we value his divine intervention. In Simon’s case, there is hesitation, which is natural and human. They have labored all night. They have spent time and energy. They have been in the profession of fishing. If they did not catch fish in the night, why try in the daytime? Simon’s reluctance is not wrong. Then, he says to Jesus, “But if you say so, I will put out the nets.”
Although Simon and his friends are fishermen, Jesus is asking for more. The demand to “Put out into the deep,” is an invitation to put Simon and his group in the bigger space of a divine encounter, to experience the depth of God’s love, and to prepare for the risk of discipleship. It means to plunge into the Master’s will. Christ intends a radical transformation for Simon through grace. Christ is saying to Peter, “Lower your nets of concerns and worries for God’s catch, and you will never be the same again.” Hence, he maintains, “Do not be afraid. From now on you will be catching men.”
A negative self-image makes us myopic and limiting. It presents mostly inadequacies that prevent a healthy response to God’s invitation. Such voices can command us to believe, “I am not good enough. I cannot do it. I am not qualified, etc.” This is the devil’s tactic to make us want to quit God’s presence and steal wonderful opportunities to cast into the deep with God. Self-doubts, anxieties, fears, disbelief, despair, hopelessness, and a feeling of unworthiness are all weapons of failure from the evil one. This is old Simon, old Paul, or the same Isaiah of old.
The new Simon says to Jesus, “But if you say so.” He realizes the need for openness to God’s grace to step beyond the shores. Peter’s physical and mental faculties are taken over by faith and trust. He realizes that God does not always ask for the perfect, but rather for the willing. God desires our presence, not our qualification. Sometimes we are afraid, discouraged, and overwhelmed, yet God wants to use us. Father Mac Foley wrote a book that highlights the spiritual and psychological dimensions of Saint Therese titled, The Context of Holiness (2008). In the introduction, it says, “The spiritual life is not an encapsulated sphere, cloistered from the realities of our human existence. Rather it is our response to God within the physical, psychological, social, and emotional dimensions of life.” Simon’s encounter with Jesus makes this real, a radical response to God’s invitation warrants our entire commitment. We must cast into the deep with Christ.
Here is the deal, your “If you say so,” must trump your “We have labored all night.” God cares more about what he can do with you than what you can do by yourself. Who tells you that Christ does not know your inadequacies, faults, and failures? He is not departing from you because you are a sinful person. He wants you to follow in your sinfulness because he will make you clean and whole. Let’s go with Christ.
For this week, it might be great to discover where God might be asking you to “put out into the deep.” What aspects of you do you want God to work on? What elicits such negative fears or responses that you find yourself doubting and pulling back? What hinders you from saying to God, “Here I am?” “If you say so…”
Casting into the deep is an invitation to a deeper prayer life and to embrace God's presence through sustained spiritual activities. Our successes happen with God, yet they require our cooperation with God's spirit. We must seek the face of God deeply. We must step out of the boats of self-reliance and into the depths of grace. That way, we are not stuck in our old selves. The day dawns with Christ in the boat and then the catch happens.
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